Reflection on James Baldwin’s Notes of a Native Son
"It was the Lord who knew of the impossibility every parent in that room faced: how to prepare the child for the day when the child would be despised and how to create in the child — by what means? — a stronger antidote to this poison than one had found for oneself".
What a gut-wrenching quote. The question is often posed by adults: Aren't problems of bias, prejudice, and discrimination concerns for grownups? Why drag children into it? Others are reluctant to bring up a subject that they may not completely grasp or with which they do not feel comfortable engaging in conversation at this point in their lives. Yet some, particularly those who have experienced prejudice homophobia, racism, or any form of bigotry frankly do not have such options. In one regard, they are grownup concerns. Adults have the authority to establish, to educate, to sustain bias—and to erase it. In another sense, since the realities of prejudice and discrimination begin to impact children’s development early, it is developmentally appropriate to address them in our work with young children. Because they don't want to bring attention to their differences, many parents are reluctant to discuss them with their children. Regardless of whether you bring up the matter, kids are going to notice when someone has a different look than they do. They also take note when it seems that certain groups are treated more favorably than others is a phenomenon. Studies demonstrate that even babies can discriminate skin tones. By early infancy, youngsters tend to have more positive evaluations of persons they regard as “the same” as they are — even if the similarities are meaningless. Ignoring or ignoring the matter isn’t safeguarding children, it’s leaving them susceptible to bigotry that occurs everywhere we live.
All children may benefit from talking freely about diversity and racism. But for youngsters in groups more likely to be a target of prejudice, such interactions may be even more crucial. Perceived prejudice has been connected to physical and mental health issues including anxiety, sadness, obesity, addiction, depression, and severe stress. Anxiety over being singled out for discrimination is thought to be a contributing factor in a lot of these health issues. Discrimination-related stress, I know, influenced how I felt about myself growing up. I am a member of the LGBT community, yet I was never taught about the acceptance of various sexualities. Where I came from, being straight was the only option. Anything that deviated from that was devilish, disgusting, make-believe, and punishable by God. If I had just one (literally one) adult in my life tell me that it was okay to be gay, my entire childhood would have been different. I wouldn't have hated myself, had intrusive depressive thoughts, overthought everything, been a faux version of Nico that I thought others wanted me to be, and would've been able to actually be a child. Instead, I was trying to be an adult at age 11. These grown men and women that believe teaching children about discrimination is "not for kids" don't realize it is only making them grow up faster than they should. In the end, communicating honestly with children prepares them for coping with prejudice and helps them keep discrimination-related stress under control.
Embrace diversity. When your kid inquires about the color of someone else's skin, take advantage of the chance to point out the similarities as well as the differences between individuals. Engage in a dialogue about the media with your children. Be cognizant of racial prejudice in books and films and seek ones that show individuals from diverse racial and ethnic groups in varying positions, like films that showcase minority actors portraying lead roles. Learn about various cultures' cuisines, clothing, stories, and beliefs. Try to discover methods to expose your kid to other cultures and individuals from different races and nationalities. Such favorable connections with various racial and social groups early on can minimize prejudice and foster greater cross-group friendships. There are many ways to bring the outside world inside the home. You just have to actively participate in this change. In Baldwin's example, their child's problem was evident to the eye. What if your kid's struggle lies beneath the surface? By being proactive and informing them about all walks of life, these seemingly "invisible" problems can be eliminated before they arise. My parents couldn't "see" that I was gay, but I still could have received an antidote.
